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Hello everyone! I wanted to give you all an update on my health, since it’s been awhile. Physically, not a lot has changed recently. I’m still in a lot of pain. It’s been increasing lately. We’ve been trying to adjust my medicine to help control the pain. I did some testing and am planning to do some more for specific things like Lyme and co-infections to see how things are doing in my body. We are working again with the Envita Home Care Team. Depending on the results will determine the next step.
The biggest changes with me recently have been mentally. I had not realized the way I had gotten so depressed last year. None of the treatments I did seemed to help, and I gave up. I had gotten to the point where I didn’t even want to live anymore. Basically, I shut myself up and quit talking to people and taking an interest in life. I didn’t know how depressed I really was.
Now, I’m making conscious decisions to fill my mind with Scripture and other positive thoughts. I am learning to push through and do things even when I don’t feel like it which is helping me cope with all the physical problems. It’s still hard for me to talk and communicate, but I am making an effort to do it anyway. I know that it is very important for me to stay connected with people and get the encouragement I need to continue fighting.
When a doctor told me that possibly a lot of my struggles were my brain malfunctioning, I thought that if I just had a positive outlook and put forth effort, it would make my symptoms go away. It was a big disappointment to me when that didn’t happen. Now, I realize that my mental outlook doesn’t necessarily change the symptoms, but it does help my quality of life.
I have been making goals each month to keep myself motivated. One of my goals for February was to write 2 blog posts. My goals for this month:
1. Write 1 letter a day for Lifeline Layettes and decorate it with stickers.
2. Post 4 blog posts
3. Research and place orders for Lifeline Gifts when we have sufficient funds.
I’ve also been working on some exercises in my chair and focusing on eating. While it’s still not easy for me to eat, it has helped to have a consistent routine.
I’ve been thinking a lot about Lifeline Gifts. Not only is it something we hope will be a lifeline to the people it blesses, it is also a lifeline for me. It gives me something to think about and plan for as I sit in my chair each day. Having the Lord give me this ministry opportunity so that I can be useful is so important to me, and I thank Him for it.
Right now, we are in the process of expanding Lifeline Gifts. We are seeking new outlets for giving out the layette bundles to women who choose LIFE for their babies. I am handwriting a note to go in each bundle. Ezra has made some changes to the website to make it clear what the two ministries are that Lifeline Gifts does: Lifeline Boxes to needy children around the world and Lifeline Layettes for women who keep their babies.
We are working towards writing a pro-life booklet with a gospel message that we can include in the bundles. Ezra also recently designed 2 bookmarks. One is a bookmark to put in the layette bundles for the mothers. The other bookmark tells about Lifeline Gifts and can be distributed to spread the word about Lifeline Gifts and remind people to pray for the ministry.
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At this point, I don’t know how much my health will improve, but I’m continuing to press on in God’s strength. There are things that He has for me to do from my chair. I can’t control my physical health, but I’m focusing on making an effort with the Lord’s help to be positive mentally and focus on the things I can do!
Thank you for your support and prayers! Please continue praying that I’ll have strength to keep going.
My friend Bethany, who is a tremendous writer and who knows me very well, wrote this for me. We’ve been communicating for 4 years now daily. Thanks Bethany!
Below are some pictures from my 2 hospital stays.
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